Takanakuy: Fistfighting in the Andes

Takanakuy: Fistfighting in the Andes
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Once a year around Christmas in the Peruvian Andes, the whole town gets together to dance, drink and beat the hell out of each other.

Christmas festivities vary widely around the world, and are widely a steaming crock of boring shit. Ooh, Swedish girls wear a crown of candles the night before Chistmas? Please tell me more about this scintillating national cust-snzzzZZZZZZZZZ.

In the Peruvian Andes, folks know how to celebrate the season right. What they do is, they put on a colorful ski-mask, dress up like Mad Max mountain bikers, tie a dead eagle to their heads, and get drunk and dance for about a week straight. Then, come Christmas morning, they all gather together in the middle of town and beat the baby bejesus out of each other. Now we’re talking, right?

The festival is called Takanakuy and its equal parts sporting event, indigenous display of hypermasculine defiance in the face of all the lilywhite metropolitan sissies in Lima, and makeshift judicial system. The province of Chumbivilcas, where Takanakuy takes place, has about three cops total and is a stomach-wrecking 10-hour drive through the mountains to the nearest courthouse. So if you’ve got a beef with a neighbor or someone’s taken your girl or sheep, you don’t go crying about it to some judge. You bury it away until Christmas, then get yourself all beered up and exact some Andean justice with your fists and feet. Guys, girls, little kids, old drunk men in high-waisted pants; everybody in town fights at Takanakuy.

This year we decided to forego the annual family snoozefest and head into the mountains of Peru to test our mettle against the some of the hardiest people from one of the harshest environments in the Americas. We hope you like it, since it broke our mothers’ hearts.

Hosted by Thomas Morton | Originally aired in 2011 on http://VICE.com

Follow Thomas on Twitter – http://twitter.com/Babyballs69

Thumbnail photo by Nicolas Villaume: http://www.nicolasvillaume.com/

Watch Bride Kidnapping in Kyrgyzstan here: http://bit.ly/Bride-Kidnapping

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48 Comments

  1. This vice guy is pretty unlikable. "playing some pretty boss music" "this is the same song, this is the same song" and ofcourse he speaks through his nose and wears skinny jeans. I hope he's fights he needs to have the hipster male feminist knocked out of him…. "I'm starting to freak out, pretty sure my bowels just clinched" watching him fight was the saddest thing I've ever seen, him holding his leg up the entire fight, appearing be kick, while actually avoiding being punched anywhere but his leg pretty pathetic

  2. I'm SO glad you didn't pretend that you were all that when it comes to throwing hands, cause you ain't. But it's all good….for a laugh!!! These fights remind me of my misspent youth when "certain" idiots would get the retards or spazs to fight each other. It was EPIC hilarity, at least for those of us NOT fighting!!!

  3. This man is like he's in his 30's but fights like he's already 70…i bet them kids could kick his ass…but he tried…though it made him look like those idiots whose fighting style is just based on movies…???

  4. While other people might find this primitive, it's a lot more peaceful than Americans wielding guns around and shooting the fuck out of civilians.

  5. The narrator gabbles, so one doesn't catch everything he says. So many people need to learn about good diction. Slow down a bit and enjoy your own speech!

  6. que buen corto documental .-. me parece increíble que personas en USA entiendan la forma de vivir de esas personas cuando en Perú aun los tratamos como salvajes .-.

  7. The white guy had some guts, but you could tell his opponent wasn't trying at all in comparison to his first fight…… And he still beat the American somehow!? Lmao

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